Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Embrace

- - -
Global warming . . .
- - -
When I came here 
Thirty odd years ago 
We had summers of 
Fog 
June gloom, 
May grey 
We never saw 
The sun 
It was a local joke 
Want sun? 
Drive to Ojai 
Twenty degrees difference 
Twenty miles away 
Bright sunshine. 

Now 
Something's changed 
It's hot, hot, hot 
And it's only 
May 

We used to go to the beach 
On Christmas Day 
Just because we could 
It was our little ritual 
With family
So far flung 

Warmer then on Christmas 
Than in May 

Now it's just hot 
My garden doesn't know 
What to do 

Spring flowers 
Used to drippy fog 
Are wilting early 
I suppose we'll 
Adjust -
The outdoor shower 
Will be used to cool -
Indoors we'll adjust 

Old electrics barely support 
The little window box cooler
But it helps if 
One gets near enough 

Hot flashes have helped 
This one learn to tolerate 
Extremely warm 
Conditions -
Learn to sweat !
Even if genteel women aren't 
Supposed to 

No one told the 
Maker of 
Such a requirement 

But if it gets any hotter 
What then -
If food can't grow? 

Tonight I go 
To dance some tango 
It will be warm 
The doors will be open 
To the street 
Maybe much like 
Buenos Aires 

People walking by 
Look in with curiosity 
What is this foreign 
Scene ?
Americans dancing 
Together 
Just as if 
They knew 
How -
Americans enjoying
Embracing one another 
And moving with grace -
And you will arrive late 
And I anticipate 
Your particular embrace. 

Sunday, May 11, 2014

Bar be que

Old friends 
And new ones 
Bar be que ones 

Friend s 
What a special thing 
It is 
To get together 
Around an outdoor 
Fire
And sip wine and 
Talk of things 

-Get to know 
Some people 
From a different 
World 

What do they do 
And how do they
do it?
What do they know 
And 
How do they know it ? 

I get to see 
My life, my time,
My choices 
From some 
Other perspective 

I have chosen 
And life has chosen 
For me 

And I do 
The best 
I can 

Some have energy 
Some don't 
Some have courage and 
The ability 
To cope 

It's good to see -
To get to know 
Others 
And what their minds 
Are made of 

And where their hearts 
Have gotten 
To


Friday, May 9, 2014

No Small Thing !

Butterflies circling -
Playing in a spring garden 
Breeze cooling -
The hot flashes. 
The morning tea 
Brings on 

Freeway sounding distant 
Today -
I slept last night !
And dreamed of 
Many things. 
Workmen taking my 
House apart -
Termites 
Eating it -
There was a dog 
On my lap 
At a race track 
Don't know what to think 
About that 
The man-friend was there -
But distant 

I have a friend who believes in 
Lucid dreaming 
I think I've done enough -
For one day -
And would rather not -
Dream at all 

Some say the butterfly dreams 
That It is a human sometimes 
Or that this world 
Is a dream 
And we will awake 
Some day -
The Buddha was awake 
And then had 
So much to say 
About it -

I'm tired of talking 
I have existential fatigue -
Along with being 
Old -

But I can give thanks 
For this shade 
And this way 
Of being today 

Nothing hurts 
I have food 
And a place to stay -

The hummingbird comes 
Around 
Curious -
And several types of 
Butterfly's 
Play 

If I were a painter 
I would paint 
- today- 
As such -
I am thankful 
I am not -
What a lot of bother 
With brushes and tubes 
Of paint 

I am only compelled to 
Try to describe -
In words 
The glory of 
Spring 

No small thing!

Sleep

Sleep -
It is a mystery 
To me 

This afternoon - late 
I lay down for a moment 
And hours passed 
- no one could have separated me 
From that 
What comfort - 
     What bliss 
What an opiate!

But now I wait 
     Late at night
For the idea to dawn again 
For the sleepiness 
     To descend 
Knowing that it's so 
     Necessary 
To the quality of 
My life tomorrow 

Fiddling with Facebook 
Looking up old "x's"
Feeling wonderful 
That I can -
That there is no parent 
No overseer -
To say 
Anything -
Ah 
What luxury 
It may not seem like much 
But from an  over controlled 
Childhood 
I still run -
I am rebelling here 
Staying up till 
One  
Hiding from 
Responsibility 

It will all be there tomorrow 
The lists 
Are still long 
I check off one or two things 
In a dulsitory fashion -
Until the next emergency arises 
And takes presidence 

But sleep 
(Which is what this was
Supposed to be about) 
Is no where to be found 
No where around 

As we get older 
It gets more complex 
Some nights - awake 
All night 
For no apparent reason
Just 
The sheer cussedness 
     Of life 
The more we fight and try 
To sleep 
The further away 
It drifts 
Anger doesn't help 
Murdering helpless pillows 
Beating on them 
Cursing - 
At three or four in the morning 
Is probably 
Counter productive -
Not in the 
"Sleep therapy"
Curriculum 

Was that a yawn? 
The beginnings of a possibility 
Of a return 
To the blessed state 
Of non-existence ? 

One can but try . . .

"X"

Dodged a few bullets 
Lately -
Thanking the gods 
For that -
Waiting for the next ones -
Knowing they'll come. 
Also knowing that - that's 
Life 

Obviously ordained 
To be that way 
And therefore 
Somehow sacred
No matter how much "i"
Do not approve. 

Wondering 
This evening about 
The incredible conduct of 
"Friends" 
Very "x"
How could they imagine that 
Cruelty and jealousy are
Appropriate -
Here 

Don't they know 
It all comes back 
On us -
Our hearts are closed 
To the extent 
We close them 
To others 

I suppose they mean 
To hurt us 
Because they 
Have been hurt 
Before 

Forgive and forget 
Forgive and forget 

Should have all been done 
By now 

Tuesday, May 6, 2014

Them

Jury duty ---
Save me please !
Boredom has descended 
With palpable palpability

Someone should study this 
Some scientific research is needed 
When people refuse to do this 
Our civilization is through 
It will have crumbled into 
Dust -

This one guy here 
Can sleep 
Sitting up
Why is it guys 
Can do that ?
And I can't. 

My friend will descend
Into dreams 
In the middle of something important 
I'm saying
And awake apologetically 
When I'm done -

As I was saying,
Our civilization 
Will be done -
When we don't allow "them"
To treat us 
This way -
To coral us 
To imprison us 
- For just the day 
So that we may decide 
Which others of us 
Must be imprisioned -
Where they can get 
Free food and lodging 
Paid for by us 

There is a logic here 
Somewhere 
I sure of it 

I'm almost 
Certain that this 
Makes sense to someone 
Somewhere 
In the great halls 
Of 
"Them"

Sunday, May 4, 2014

Friends

He's been to the jungle 
He's taken the drugs 
Led by shamans
He's seen the inside of his head 
     Expanding 
     Outward 

Now, one would hope, 
Some knowledge of 
     The heart 
Might be 
Forthcoming 
That the sky might 
     Open up 
Inside 

That he might see the heart 
Expand 
-The spiritual connection 
With -

There is no explanation for 
What he's done 
What he's seen 
But the size of the bugs 
Was obscene . . .

Am I jealous that some people 
Have the health 
To travel ?

I suppose . . .

But from what I've been told 
The greatest journey 
Is within -
The greatest test of courage 
Is to meet ourselves 
In silence 
And let God come in 
And be our friend