Doctors

Six months to live 

- what if they tell me that - ?

Am I just being paranoid 

Or preparing . . . 

I have always wondered what's 

On the other side 

Is it a river Styx 

A mount Olympus 

Some pearly gates 

Or a burning place 

Does the soul 

Hang together 

Or dissipate 

     Into space 

An eternal sleep ?

An eternal nightmare ?

The bliss and the white light 

Of God ?

The latter would, of course, 

Be preferable 

If we have any choice 

Worth Watching

Aliens among us -

The Internet is 

     A wonderful thing 

Crop circles 

And messages 

- conspiracies 

I had no idea 

What 

Would come up 

Once the cable was 

Cut -

I do miss tv

And I'm sure it misses me 

I could channel surf 

     So well 

I had my standard pattern 

And many variations 

Default channels 

     To check 

And always up on 

     National news 

The numbers on the remote 

Were worn off

They call it a plug in drug 

And I said,

"So, that's a good thing, right?" 

But then the plumbing and 

The doctor's bills 

And a certain sense 

Of adventure - hit -

Without warning . . . 

Can I do this ? 

Can I live without ? 

There is no Star Trek 

There is no Dr Who 

What do I do 

If they come back on 

     Again? 

There are books and books 

Cluttering up 

Around here 

I could look in a book . . . 

I could contemplate 

The inner realms . . .

I could go visit a friend 

Who has 

Tv . . .

Are there any addiction programs 

For this -

Twelve steps 

Group therapy ?

There are times when 

One just 

Wants to forget

To be talked to and shown pictures 

Even if 

It's only old movies and 

     Car chases 

Why can't "they" manage 

     To be 

      "Creative" 

One can think of so many 

     Wonderful things 

That would be 

"Worth Watching"

Testing, Testing

Waiting. Waiting. 

Why does it take so much 

     Waiting. 

And now there's a child 

     In a stroller -

Why is there always 

     A child in a stroller 

     And why 

Do they always 

Sit by me ?

As I wait to 

Determine 

If I live or die 

And how much trouble 

     It will be. 

Tests 

In the old days 

Did not involve 

Blood 

Pencil and paper

In those days -

But I would still

Worry mightily 

At least 

There is no studying 

For this -

No late nights 

Of panic 

But yes. 

Late nights of fear 

Of a different variety

Life and death 

Draw

Closer together 

It is destined 

To be so 

It is written 

It is the way it is

One cannot fight 

     Progress!

Old Hat

It was time for the gardening hat 

To die 

It was thrown 

     With regret 

On the campfire 

In the back garden

Last 

Evening 

It had seen many days 

Of enjoyment and sunshine 

And some rain

It had shared the joys of the garden

And 

The pains 

There was more sun getting through

Than shade being provided

The straws in the hat 

Had given their all 

And so like they do 

By the Ganges 

In India -

It went up in flames -

It's form remaining for 

     Quite some time -

Burning 

An old friend 

A companion 

Gone -

It's essence to be scattered 

In the garden it helped 

Water

The Dance

So tired of 

     Relationship

So ready to 

     Leave 

Just want 

     To be 

Done 

I can't become 

The one you want 

I am not her 

Please allow me 

To 

Escape 

To be 

     Free

But now -

What is this ?

Is he learning 

     To turn 

To lead 

     To walk 

     To tango ?

The gods laugh 

     That's what they do 

For now there is 

     No way 

Those tall shoulders 

     Can be left 

To chance 

     Now there is 

No way 

I cannot 

Dance - !

after all

can't force it 
this muse 
where has she gone 
today ?

i guess there's nothing 
she 
wants 
to say - 

these fragile bodies 
we think we're so special . . .
and we are 
I know we are !

just think about it 
won't you?
all this time and space 
exists - 
all these plants and trees 
to make oxygen 
for me ! 

yes, we mess it up 
but 
here we 
     still are 

gravity holds us down -
which is created by 
the earth spinning round
or the fact that it's so big 
to begin with -
either way, 
     it's awesome   

the sun comes up 
the sun goes down 
without that 
where would we be?

who thought this up 
It wasn't me 
It was all built up
for us 

to experience 
these experiences 
of being human 
here and now

someone 
obviously, 
wants us to 

probably would like 
some thanks 
too 

and then there's our 
connection to 

that's the most important 
thing 
it gives us a feeling of being 
and belonging 
and life 
and love
and light 

i guess the muse 
had something she 
wanted to say 

after all   

Rumi

I look around 

And I see no 

Zen flowers 

Anywhere  :-(

This being has not been 

Contacting 

The infinate 

Lately 

This body 

Has been 

Sic

With fever 

For days -

Inspiration 

Has been 

Lacking 

I 

Don't want to 

Be 

This way -

Without the flowers -

The product 

Of contemplation -

The daisys of 

Devotion 

The roses of 

Heart felt 

Connection

The spice 

Of life 

Has been lacking 

What did Rumi do 

When he felt like 

***** ?